Is It me?

I’m sitting at home watching Sex and the City while thinking about my failed relationships. It bothers me that I’m still single, and most of my ex’s are in relationships. The last guy I liked was tall dark and handsome. We met at Blue Martini on a Thursday night. We had some drinks, Showed off our salsa moves on the dance floor, and chatted with eachothers friends. The whole thing was definitely unexpected. Even though, at first I wasn’t extremely attracted to him or thought of him as relationship material, I decided to keep seeing him for the rest of the week.

We had so much fun going out, meeting eachothers friends, and the sex was amazing (Which is something he mentioned first), but I guess none of it was enough to keep it going, because he ended up pulling away. When I asked what was up, he told me he was going overseas to be with his ex. That hit me hard, not because I was in love with him or anything just yet, but because thing’s like this has happened before.

It also confuses me. With the hand holding in public, and the one on one conversations and quality time at his place…was it not enough? Was I not enough? He said he didn’t want to lead me on, yet he already did. Just the fact he mentioned another girl bothers me the most. I’ve had guy’s who have chosen other girl’s over me and I can’t help to question myself: What did I do wrong? Am I the problem? Is it me?

3 thoughts on “Is It me?

  1. Well, as someone who has been single for most of his life, trust me I have asked myself that question for so many times. But in the end I came up with a simple solution: it’s their loss. And that is something you should do as well. From what I have seen here on your blog, you are a very kind, fun and beautiful woman. And if that guy simply went away to be with someone else, you should simply say he is an idiot. (And yes that sounds easy, I know, and might not even always work, because there will always be doubts). But there are others out there and I know you will mee mr right eventually. Never lose hope, and above all never lose faith in yourself for anything. As I said: it’s their loss. It’s better to invest your time in people that are worth it, instead of people that aren’t. So really keep being who you are, and you will see that eventually it will pay off😊

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  2. You can’t think like that, it’s never you. Some things aren’t meant to be and some people just can’t see. In life, oft things happen for a reason and like you said, you weren’t really attracted to the guy anyway or thought of him as relationship material, so perhaps your body was telling you something. Don’t grieve loss for something better will come around in a better form. But in a relationship you have to be all in and not just sexually, his loss and your gain. Now you get to search for one who deserves you and one you deserve.🌹

    Liked by 1 person

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